12 Ways I Think My Marriage Will Be Even Better in My Thirties
5 Reasons Why I Hesitated to Take My Husbands Last Name
I Am Not the 60 Percent: On Not Letting the Second Divorce Statistic Become Your Statistic
A Characteristic I Am Thankful My Spouse Has
12 Sweet and Simple Ways to Show Your Spouse Gratitude
7 Reasons You Should Say Yes to a Quickie (aka a short date!) With Your Spouse
10 of the Most Disgusting Things I Do for Love
Were You Disappointed by the Way Your Spouse Proposed?
Sweetest Day Is Coming: 5 Simple Ways to Show Your Spouse You Care
10 Things Every Married Person Should Know About Their Spouse
10 Dating Do's and Don'ts We Can Steal from the Disney Princesses
5 Fun and Frightful Ideas for a Spooky Date Night
Survey Reveals the Most Difficult Year of Marriage
How Love Is Like the Seasons
The song says that "sorry is the hardest word." Sometimes, maybe. Other times it might just be "goodbye." Here's a story from one of you about not being able to say it:
After my three-year relationship with my first love ended last January, I started dating another boy. Whilst my first boyfriend treated me well most of the time, when I look back I don’t think that we had a huge amount in common. In general, he treated me very well, and I overall I consider him to be a very good guy. But I was not very confident and allowed myself to defer to what he wanted a lot of the time, not just in terms of sex, but in terms of where we would go out to eat, what we would spend the day doing, what I would wear. I could have been more assertive; he didn’t force me to do anything I didn’t want to do, but perhaps he could have learnt to take compromise a little better.
Since then, I dated an international student from my university for six months. Not only did I feel that I was much more mature and able to be assertive in this relationship, I also feel that he allowed and encouraged me to express my opinions and preferences. This was made a lot easier by the fact that we had a lot more in common. He actually wanted to have intellectual conversations, and go to art galleries, but also sometimes eat greasy pizza and watch a stupid film.
This year I am abroad as part of degree, and he has graduated and moved back across the Atlantic. We knew that we had to break up (I did the long distance thing for a while with boy #1, and it was so hard) as we don’t know when or if we will ever be living anywhere near each other again. But it was something really difficult to accept; after a few months of being apart, I am still as deeply in love with him as I was when we broke up, and I have no idea what to do about it.
We said we would keep in touch, and still be friends. We are still in touch, but I am worried that this is making it harder for me to get over him. The thing is I don’t know if I want to get over him. I have always believed it is better to be as honest as possible with people, so when we talk I still tell him that I love him, and he says it back. But at the same time it is usually me who initiates the conversation; I am the one who is putting the most into keeping in touch. I can’t resist it even when I try and tell myself to try and let it go.
I am very lucky to be happy in almost every other aspect of my life. Of course, moving abroad is scary and presents challenges, but it is so exciting, I have met so many great people already, and the food is fantastic. But when I have a new experience, or learn something new, or meet somebody interesting, I want to share it with him. And I am stuck in a sort of limbo because I try and resist, I don’t want to overdo it, but I never can resist. I feel bad either way. I have even been honest with him about it, and he says that he doesn’t mind, that he likes being in touch and that he understands how difficult it is. But I don’t believe him, something inside me still tells me that I should just cut him out of my life, at least until I am ready to be just friends. I can’t do it, it would break my heart. {end story}
You ever struggle to let someone (or something) go, even though you knew you needed to? How'd you do it – or are you still hanging on? Let's #discuss, and get it off our chests. Come on…
5 Reasons Why I Hesitated to Take My Husbands Last Name
I Am Not the 60 Percent: On Not Letting the Second Divorce Statistic Become Your Statistic
A Characteristic I Am Thankful My Spouse Has
12 Sweet and Simple Ways to Show Your Spouse Gratitude
7 Reasons You Should Say Yes to a Quickie (aka a short date!) With Your Spouse
10 of the Most Disgusting Things I Do for Love
Were You Disappointed by the Way Your Spouse Proposed?
Sweetest Day Is Coming: 5 Simple Ways to Show Your Spouse You Care
10 Things Every Married Person Should Know About Their Spouse
10 Dating Do's and Don'ts We Can Steal from the Disney Princesses
5 Fun and Frightful Ideas for a Spooky Date Night
Survey Reveals the Most Difficult Year of Marriage
How Love Is Like the Seasons
The song says that "sorry is the hardest word." Sometimes, maybe. Other times it might just be "goodbye." Here's a story from one of you about not being able to say it:
After my three-year relationship with my first love ended last January, I started dating another boy. Whilst my first boyfriend treated me well most of the time, when I look back I don’t think that we had a huge amount in common. In general, he treated me very well, and I overall I consider him to be a very good guy. But I was not very confident and allowed myself to defer to what he wanted a lot of the time, not just in terms of sex, but in terms of where we would go out to eat, what we would spend the day doing, what I would wear. I could have been more assertive; he didn’t force me to do anything I didn’t want to do, but perhaps he could have learnt to take compromise a little better.
Since then, I dated an international student from my university for six months. Not only did I feel that I was much more mature and able to be assertive in this relationship, I also feel that he allowed and encouraged me to express my opinions and preferences. This was made a lot easier by the fact that we had a lot more in common. He actually wanted to have intellectual conversations, and go to art galleries, but also sometimes eat greasy pizza and watch a stupid film.
This year I am abroad as part of degree, and he has graduated and moved back across the Atlantic. We knew that we had to break up (I did the long distance thing for a while with boy #1, and it was so hard) as we don’t know when or if we will ever be living anywhere near each other again. But it was something really difficult to accept; after a few months of being apart, I am still as deeply in love with him as I was when we broke up, and I have no idea what to do about it.
We said we would keep in touch, and still be friends. We are still in touch, but I am worried that this is making it harder for me to get over him. The thing is I don’t know if I want to get over him. I have always believed it is better to be as honest as possible with people, so when we talk I still tell him that I love him, and he says it back. But at the same time it is usually me who initiates the conversation; I am the one who is putting the most into keeping in touch. I can’t resist it even when I try and tell myself to try and let it go.
I am very lucky to be happy in almost every other aspect of my life. Of course, moving abroad is scary and presents challenges, but it is so exciting, I have met so many great people already, and the food is fantastic. But when I have a new experience, or learn something new, or meet somebody interesting, I want to share it with him. And I am stuck in a sort of limbo because I try and resist, I don’t want to overdo it, but I never can resist. I feel bad either way. I have even been honest with him about it, and he says that he doesn’t mind, that he likes being in touch and that he understands how difficult it is. But I don’t believe him, something inside me still tells me that I should just cut him out of my life, at least until I am ready to be just friends. I can’t do it, it would break my heart. {end story}
You ever struggle to let someone (or something) go, even though you knew you needed to? How'd you do it – or are you still hanging on? Let's #discuss, and get it off our chests. Come on…